The most helpful feedback I've had in my life has been some of the most hurtful to receive initially. The fact is that however humble we may think we are, it's natural to want to believe that we're right, brilliant and wise. Therefore, when we hear feedback which is to the contrary, we can feel under attack, something which makes us defensive and can hinder our ability to develop.
When people become leaders, the need to be adored and admired often increases with the responsibility and therefore the potential pain of receiving negative feedback increases with that need.
Wise leaders recognise that the need for adoration is natural, but it limits their leadership potential ... because if you crave adoration:
1) You'll get told what people think you want to hear, because it's perceived that you can't take the bad news. Thus you live in a bubble rather than reality... and eventually, all bubbles burst!
2) The problems for which you're responsible are not reported to you by the people around you but they'll certainly grumble about them (behind your back).
3) You become isolated
Controlling your adoration needs involves:
- Remaining humble
- Being able to laugh at yourself
- Adopting the following mantra - the best leaders know they are doing well when the performance of each team member surpasses their own performance. With this in mind, such leaders leave no space for adoration needs, because they're so focused on the development of their team members.
Thanks for reading
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